Jizz, Jizz, Jizz, and Jizz Again
We start in the Dutch second division, where a guy by the name of Jizz Hornkamp ran rampant for four goals in 34 minutes on Saturday. The performance sent the 22 year-olds name trending, much to the amusement of 15 year-olds in the English-speaking world.
Comical names aside, the dutch talent and former Ajax player needed the production, as his team Den Bosch could only draw Excelsior 4-4. The real question is does this name outrank other names like Andre Andre, David Seaman, and Kevin Lasagna in the Funny Name XI? Please direct all puns or other double entendres to the comments section.
Rossi, Castroneves Win in Daytona
The Rolex 24 Hours of Daytona took place at Daytona Motor Speedway last weekend, with Indycar drivers Alexander Rossi and Helio Castroneves taking the overall victory in the number 10 Konica Minolta Acura, along with Ricky Taylor and Felipe Albuquerque. The win earned Wayne Taylor his third consecutive win as an owner, and fourth in the last five editions of the race.
Some other notable drivers include Jimmy Johnson who finished second overall along with former Formula 1 pilot Kamui Kobayashi and Simon Pagnaud, and Juan Pablo Montoya finished fourth.
Chapecoense Return to First Division
Many will recall the fatal plane crash that claimed the lives of 71 in 2016 and threatened the existence of Chapecoense itself. While the club experienced relegation last season, Chapecoense immediately secured promotion this year after winning the final match of the season.
The Serie B title is the first trophy that the club has won since the fatal crash. One of the surviving players, Alan Ruschel, was captain for the final match that secured the title via a last-minute penalty that was just ice cold. Check out the tweet above for a look at the highlights and festivities, and a reminder of why we love sports.
Notice any other special moments over the weekend? Got any Hornkamp-based jokes we need to hear? Tweet us @The_Goonery and we will retweet the good ones.
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