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Ever wanted AIDS without having sex? Here's your chance!

In a week where Iowa can't figure out who won its caucus, Major League Baseball releasing this as the official Chicago White Sox Spring Training hat is the biggest abomination of all. Look, it's Spring Training, I get you want to do something different, and sell some merch but who the fuck looked at these and thought they were a good idea? It looks like either the first time an 8-year old experimented with photoshop or a reversible shirt gone wrong and I'm not sure which is a worse insult in all honesty.

The thing is, I get what Major League Baseball was trying to do with these, because in theory, something along these lines could work. Look at the Blue Jays,

Pretty nice looking hat if you ask me, and I'm sure they'll sell a decent amount but it works because of the combination of an iconic logo with one that's pretty meh if you ask me. That's where my anger comes from with this one, when the White Sox arguably have 2 or 3 iconic hat designs, what's the point in messing with a good thing?

A cultural phenom, iconic across the country.

Probably my favorite hat I've ever owned, only reason I don't have it anymore is because my head decided it wasn't done growing at 17 fucking years old.

Pure sex. I think every kid on the South Side of Chicago that wasn't an inbred Cubs' fan had one of these hats at one point. Hell, I still have one and probably will keep one in my rotation for as long as I'm alive.

The thing is, if you had told me at the start of the offseason I'd be getting worked about a Spring Training hats 8 days before pitchers and catchers reported and not Jerry Reinsdorf refusing to make moves I'd be elated. People still like to hate on the White Sox, they'll say they're second-class in the city, but guess what? This year starts the takeover, so buckle the fuck up.

Have fun dealing with this for the next decade #pray4theleague

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