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Apologies In Advance If I Kill Your Grandma

Updated: May 29, 2020


COVID-19 has impacted our lives more than I think anyone ever anticipated. We're rapidly approaching 3 months of quarantining, and just when you think things are slowly starting to return to normalcy in Chicago, Mayor Lori Lightfoot said restaurants and bars will not be allowed to reopen outdoor seating on May 29th like the rest of the state. While I'm not smart enough to understand if she's able to do this, it's nonsense that she doesn't think people from across the city will drive to the nearest suburb to enjoy a slice of normal life. Don't blame them either, such a shame to see so many local spots going under because of this... can't wait for the three currency exchanges that will replace them in my neighborhood within the next year.

It was not an easy decision by any stretch of the imagination. In fact, it was quite difficult knowing that there's a possibility of me taking out every one of your grandmas without even trying. But after closely consulting with my own grandmothers, they have decided that they feel it is okay that I go out of town for Memorial Day weekend. In fact, they encouraged it. I'll be heading up to Wisconsin's Northwoods in the next few hours for the long weekend, and will be spending my time getting responsibly inebriated while Musky fishing all weekend. Might even mess around and hit up the Native American Casino that's near my buddy's lake, but we'll see where the weekend takes us.


Hope all of you enjoy your Memorial Day Weekend to the best of your ability, and if you're like me and going to a state that has bars open, remember to think with your big head and not the little one. Some good vibes to send you into the weekend





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